Why do we view asking for help as a weakness and not a strength?
There once was a boy who tried to move a large rock. He pushed and pulled with all of his physical strength but the rock didn’t budge. While he has trying to move the rock, his father came by and asked the boy, “Are you using all your strength?” The boy replied, “Yes” and continued to try and move the rock by pushing as hard as he could. “Are you sure you are using all your strength?” the father asked. “Yes!” the boy replied in frustration. The father replied, “But I am standing right here and you never asked me to help you.”
How many times in your life have you struggled, felt frustrated, and you didn’t ask for help? So many people believe “I SHOULD have been able to cope with (fill in the blank) without help.” Or “When this started (a year ago, 2 years ago, etc), I thought that I could handle it on my own.” Even worse is when people believe that they have failed by asking for help.
It is always remarkable to me as a healer that asking for help is not perceived correctly as a strength. How many times have we carried a heavy burden alone? By viewing asking for help as a weakness, we wear ourselves out and create unnecessary pain and frustration in our lives. We know that asking for help carrying a heavy table etc. makes moving easier (and often the only way to make it possible!). But we don’t recognize that asking for help is a sign of strength when coping with the burdens of life such as depression, anxiety, divorce, grief, etc.
If you or someone you know is ready to try using all your strength, counseling can help. Please contact me at 314-780-8328 or cmiller@claudinemiller.com.